WHY Leadership - In a world full of opinions and feedback, whose voice should you trust?

The answer is simple: Yours. Especially in those moments when you are alone with your thoughts. 

That’s it. We can take feedback, work on our flaws, and seek out constructive criticism. But, at the end of the day, those opinions don't really matter.

While feedback is a valuable tool for growth, it's crucial to remember that it is often given without the full context of your unique goals and values.

Who else has the full context of our lives? Who has our same goals and mission? Who shares our exact values?

Nobody.

So, while I value feedback, I don’t advise taking it personally. And definitely don’t let it affect how you view yourself when you are by yourself.

Self-Confidence: The Key to Self-Leadership

Self-confidence is interwoven through this aspect of self-leadership. It has always seemed like one of those concepts without a real definition. Intangible and with 500 different meanings. However, the effects of low self-confidence are often laid bare for all to see.

In The Hospitality Industry, self-confidence enables leaders to make decisive, impactful choices, fostering an environment of trust and efficiency.

As Henry Ford said, "Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right."

Now, as someone who likes things simple and clear, I thought I'd share my tactic for building this elusive self-confidence:

Start with small, achievable promises to yourself, and gradually increase the complexity as you build trust in your own word.

• If you say you are eating a certain way - eat a certain way.

• If you say you are getting up at 5.00 am - get up at 5 am.

• If you say you are going to put your kids before your work - put your kids before your work.

• If you say you are going to do somebody a favour - do them a favour.

Simple.

Once you’ve got these down to habit, add in some new ones and keep stacking. 

The process of repeatedly making and keeping these promises to yourself will begin to build a reputation with yourself. A feeling of trust that you keep your word.

It's not good enough to skip a day. Or to break a promise. Or to think you'll start tomorrow. 

And it doesn’t matter because your boss will know, or your spouse, or your daughter, or your parents.

It matters because YOU will know.

If you aren't sure what promises to make, start with something simple. A time to get up. Or that you'll make your bed each day. Failing that, link them to your values. These values are the framework with which we make all of our decisions.

The Winning Formula

In my experience, it's very difficult to begin the journey of self-leadership without clearly defined values. Your personal ones. The ones you choose, whether consciously or not.

If you haven't chosen them yet, try working backwards.

When I was deciding on my values, I thought about the person I wanted to be and the achievements I wanted to accomplish. Then I asked myself: What kind of person would I need to be to reach these goals? Patient, kind, loyal, family-focused, passionate, competitive? The list of possibilities is endless.

The values then form the guiding compass of your world. The promises you make are then based on these values to get you where you want to go.

TL;DR

Remember, your self-opinion is paramount. Use feedback wisely, define your values, and keep promises to yourself to build self-confidence and achieve success.

When you trust yourself, you build the foundation for all other successes.

This article was thoughtfully crafted for WHY Hospitality UK by Alex Munford, an experienced hospitality leader dedicated to inspiring and empowering others.